Somehow, we're already on the verge of 2020, and I kind of can't believe that. For whatever reason, it feels like it's still September, and I can't seem to wrap my head around a new year. But alas, time is ticking away, and all the magic and promise of a new year is upon us. 

I LOVE a good, fresh start. I love the idea of renewing and beginning again. What I never really loved were resolutions. I rarely kept them, and then I'd be more discouraged when I failed at whatever I'd set out to do. 

So the past several years, I've focused on a one word theme. It's something to keep me focused and grounded, and it's something I can come back to over and over again when I feel like I'm not accomplishing enough. Am I still working on my word? Then I'm doing okay! 

When I started thinking about what I wanted my word for this year to be, I knew it needed to be people focused. Pretty much the best thing in life are the relationships we have with others, right? And I want to focus there. 

So in 2020, my word is connect. 

I debated a whole host of other words first. I thought vision would be cute and clever since it's 20/20, but I tabled it when it felt like I wasn't sure where to go with it. I also loved the idea of celebrate, but it didn't focus enough on relationships for me. 

And thus, I landed on connect. Because the connections are the best things about this life. I LOVE hearing other people's stories, and I want to continue to hear those in 2020. I want to help connect other women with a business they might fall in love with just like I have in KEEP Collective. I want to connect more with my family and friends and make that quality time together count. 

And if I'm being really 100% honest, I want to make sure I'm disconnecting enough to connect. I've spent FAR too much time on my phone in the last four months - often legitimately for work - but sometimes as a way to zone out and distract too. And it's been just WAY. TOO. MUCH. So as much as I want to connect, I also want to DISconnect to focus more on relationships and quality time. 

So there's my 2020 word, friends. Are you word of the year people? What word are YOU focusing on in 2020? 

My past words of the year: 
2019: Intentional
2018: Flourish
2017: Count
2016: Thrive

Why I'm going Red for Ed, and why I hope you will too

If you live in Indiana or near Indiana, you've probably heard about the Red for Ed Movement happening on November 19. More than half the school districts in the state are closed or opting for an e-learning day, largely so that teachers can attend (and, truth be told, there just won't be enough subs ANYWHERE to cover for them). This movement has been a long time coming. 

I've been out of the classroom now for almost five years, but before that, I spent a decade teaching mostly high school English and journalism courses. And when I say that this action is necessary for the state of Indiana, action is NECESSARY, before it gets any worse. 

I know there are haters out there - believe me - I already hear your arguments. "Teachers get three months off in the summer!" "Teachers only work 8-3!" "Teachers knew what they were getting into when they went into this field!" "If you can't do, teach!" Thank you, y'all, for the same, tired arguments. Maybe decades ago, teachers got three months off and could do all their work in the workday. But this just isn't true anymore. It's not even CLOSE to true. There are so many reasons each individual educator has for why Tuesday is so important to him or her. And my list probably won't even scratch the surface. But here, in no particular order, are some of the biggest obstacles in teaching right now. 

The lack of respect in our field is startling. And Lordy, I wish I was just talking about students. The lack of respect can certainly be there among the people we teach, but I can't even begin to describe the lack of respect that comes from adults who think they know all the things. The general public has OPINIONS, y'all, and they're strong (and largely unfounded). And often times, it's parents who spread the disrespect. Almost every teacher I know has been disrespected in a major way at one point or another. My last week of teaching, I had a parent of a student come in and accuse me of not telling her child when a GIANT PAPER WE'D BEEN WORKING ON FOR WEEKS WAS DUE. Nevermind the fact that we'd already had peer edit and rough drafts due, that it had been discussed in class no less than 20 times, that it was written on the board where the class agenda ALWAYS appeared daily for the last three weeks, that the due dates were on our online gradebook that both the student and parents had access to, and that every other child in the class knew the date. My credibility and professionalism was called into question - simply because the parent COULD. It was infuriating (clearly, because five years later, I think it still raises my blood pressure). 

The system is totally biased. My last few years of teaching, I was blessed to teach journalism and our newspaper course - both electives. I also taught Junior Honors English - a required class (some form of English was required all four years). So when it came time for testing that literally determined if I would get a pay bump or not, guess what? I was always found Highly Effective and given the highest bump, if you will. Guess who sometimes didn't fall into that category? The teachers who taught remedial classes or were working with students who were literally GRADE LEVELS behind for whatever reason. The system is totally skewed, friends. Do I think I was a good teacher? I do, actually. But my students would have tested well whether I was there or not because they WANTED to. That's not always the case, and for this to be a part of a teachers pay is absolutely ludicrous. 

There aren't enough teachers and subs to go around. When I graduated college, I truly worried about getting a teaching job. I was lucky enough to score a middle school position my first year - but I knew many, many college grads who didn't get a job their first or second year out.  In order to keep that job, I had to get a certification added to my license to teach middle school because I was only licensed to teach grades 9-12 Teaching jobs were hard to come by, so I happily obliged. Before I even finished that course work, I was laid off from my first teaching job in April of my first year of teaching, and by the grace of God, I went to another district where I was hired to teach English and journalism. But guess what? I wasn't licensed to teach journalism even though I'd spent time working as a journalist at our newspaper, been an editor at our college paper, and had spent countless hours working with the same programs and curriculum I'd be teaching. So back to school I went to get my Master's of Education degree. I tell you all of this to show you the hoops I was willing to jump through to teach. It was my sole passion at the time, and I wanted to be in the classroom. And if I didn't get certified, there were plenty of other people out there who WOULD do it. 

In 2019, this just isn't the case. I know SO many districts that STILL haven't filled all their openings for the school year (in November, there are still classrooms operating with subs), and there just aren't enough subs to go around. When too many teachers are out, and not enough subs are available, teachers are the ones who end up having to sub for one another, which means they don't get a prep period that day to plan lessons, grade, attend their required meetings, or do one of any number of things they do on a daily basis. So the work comes home. Oh, and did I mention that they don't get compensated for teaching extra classes? Many districts have the "all hands on deck" mentality, and therefore teacher work time suffers greatly. 

Teachers are essentially forced to teach to the test, and it's not working. I could go on and on about this one, but I won't. Instead I'll say this. Is it working? Is all this teaching to the test working? Schools are under so much pressure to put up good numbers, and for what? Are our students coming out of school smarter and better prepared for life? Are they seeing more success in college and their careers because of these tests? Is ANY good coming from this?! I'm all for accountability, but there HAS to be a better way. 

The new requirements are insane. In the event that I haven't made the point yet, teachers work really freaking hard. I can only speak to English teachers here, because it's all I know, but I rarely, if ever, completed my work during the school day. Papers came home. Projects were graded in my classroom on the weekends. And summers were spent prepping new curriculum, going to conferences, or taking course work. So, lobbing on a 15-hour unpaid externship so that teachers can gain "real world experience" is just ridiculous. I'll say it louder for the people in the back. TEACHERS HAVE ENOUGH TO DO WITHOUT THIS REQUIREMENT. It's insulting to suggest that teachers aren't professional and don't know what they need to do in order to prepare students. It's demoralizing that as a whole, teachers are lumped into this category of being ill prepared to teach. 

Things have changed, dramatically. If you haven't been inside a school lately, I'd like to politely remind you that straight up everything has changed. We're a society that literally does everything digitally. We expect everything to be done on demand. Technology rules, often more so than actual conversation. Society as a whole seems to be skeptical. There's a lack of responsibility all the way around. Homes have changed - BIG. Family life looks different than it did 20 years ago. 

So why am I sharing this? What do I hope to accomplish. It's simply this. Now more than ever, there is a need for incredible educators. 

Our society needs it - because we need students in ALL fields to be able to go out into the world and change it for the better. 

We need those incredible educators because oftentimes, they're the most stable forces in a child's life. They're a safe space to land when life is spinning out of control. 

And we need those incredible educators because who will teach when those still there get fed up enough to leave it altogether? I've seen it happen with so much of the former staff I worked with. Who will be left to teach our future? 

So on Tuesday, I'm standing with every single educator who's marching down in Indy or sharing the cause locally. Because chances are, when those educators get home Tuesday night, they're STILL going to do work to be ready for school Wednesday. 

And they deserve better. 

Join me in going Red for Ed, friends!

From house to home: Decorating our half bath!

Remember at the beginning of the year when I said we would decorate a room a month in our new home? Welp. Here we are. Month nine. And we've just now completed our second room. 

It's not for lack of trying! We've started some small projects in the boys's rooms, but we've not seen those through yet. And we've done some work in the family room and laundry, but again, life. 

So, in order to feel slightly more accomplished, we decided to tackle the half bath. Let's take care of the smallest room first to feel like we're getting somewhere! 

Our style definitely tends toward traditional, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't love a good farmhouse accent. We can't use it throughout the whole house - we have a lot of oak and dark counters in the kitchen, and it would feel out of place. But for places like the foyer and bathroom, we thought we could bring in a few pieces. 

Before - plain walls. The biggest obstacle to overcome here is the light above the toilet (which, honestly, is just kind of a weird spot to have a light fixture in my humble opinion). I loved the dark mirror in there, so we knew we needed to pull in at least some black in the accents. And I knew I wanted a little bit of decorative and functional shelving. So to Pinterest I went! 

I found a TON of cute bathroom signs that I totally plan to use for our upstairs bathrooms, but none of them seemed appropriate for this one. So we opted for decorative wall hangings instead. These guys were only $20.99 on Amazon, and they had rave reviews! I wasn't even intending to add the little strand of lights to them, but when my husband hung them, he put them in, and I really do LOVE them! 

For shelves, we wanted something neat and simple that tied our mason jars into the dark mirror, so we opted for these two.  Again, at $23.99, they certainly didn't break the bank, and they'd be easy enough to change later if we decided to do something different over the toilet and light fixture. These two changes seem small, but I feel like they made our bathroom a little cozier and added some depth to an otherwise static space. 

I also just really love a good before and after picture. :) What are you updating right now in your home? 

Everybody has a story (and why we need to value that more)

When I was teaching high school English and journalism, my favorite assignment was based around the notion that everybody has a story. The idea was inspired by CBS reporter Steve Hartman who used to pick a random city (via dart and map). He'd fly to the city, find the first payphone and phone book he could, choose a random name, and interview whoever answered the phone. Because the whole point was everybody has a story. Whether it was a retiree or a four-year-old, he always found the most heartfelt stories to share, and I found them endearing. 

For my students, we modernized it (because who could locate a payphone and phone book these days?!) and made it slightly safer - choose someone you know - but not well - and interview him or her. Sometimes my students listened and would find someone random - their mail person, the kid who sat behind them in a different class, a bus driver. Most of the time, they chose someone closer to them - a cousin, friend, coworker. But even when they went in with a preconceived idea of what they would write about, they often came out with a totally different story. THAT was my favorite - when they dug a little deeper and got a better story than they originally intended to tell. 

Because everybody has a story. And a really good one at that. 

My love of storytelling started when I was really young. In fourth grade, I started a newsletter about our family. I found one recently, and the stories in it were about my uncles cat and dog, my new haircut (breaking news: I GOT BANGS!), and what we were doing in my class at school. It wasn't groundbreaking, earth shattering reporting, but it was fun, and I liked finding stories (even when, super selfishly, they were about me). 

But that love of storytelling never went away. In high school, I took creative writing. I LOVED it, but I never thrived there. And I couldn't figure out why, because I LOVED stories. 

And then in college, I started writing for The Observer, the conjoined Saint Mary's and Notre Dame student newspaper. I went on to become the Saint Mary's editor in my junior and senior year, and the obsession magnified 15-fold. I'd found my niche. I was a storyteller, just of the non-fiction variety. 

As a teacher, I loved reading the work of my students. Whether we were editing newspaper articles, putting together research papers, or working on personal narratives, I LOVED what my kids wrote. I MISSED those stories when I started staying home, and although I began to document the stories of my children, I knew what was missing was hearing other people's stories. 

Gratefully, I still get to help people tell their stories - this time through jewelry, and selfishly, I love hearing those stories. It's my passion and part of my purpose. But I digress, and I appreciate you sticking to this diatribe this long. 

But it all comes down to this: valuing other people and their stories is what I truly believe is going to change the world. 

Yep, I said it. And I'm sure some of you out there are giving me big eye rolls right about now. But it's so darn true. 

When we listen to each other's stories and learn more about the people in our lives, we grow to understand them. We gain empathy. We gain perspective through their experiences. We might even gain an appreciation for someone and what she's been through. This still doesn't mean you have to want to spend time with every single person you come into contact with (Lord knows there are some personalities that just don't jive!). BUT, it does mean that we might try harder to be a little kinder or extend a polite hello or just give a damn about someone other than ourselves for a minute. 

Every single one of us has a story. We're not ranking them. We're not in competition for the best or worst or most triumphant or saddest. They. All. Matter. Every person. Every story. And if we would take the time, really take the time, to listen to one another, I really think this world has a shot at being a better place. 

On running a social selling business - successfully!

If you run your own business, and especially if you're in the world of social selling, chances are you want to do it well. And you're always striving to do it better. 

Four years ago, I took a total leap of faith and started a social selling business. I'll be 100% honest with you and tell you I never saw myself doing direct sales - not because I had preconceived notions or prejudices toward the industry (I know some do). But, my background was in English and education. My master's degree is in Curriculum and Instruction with an emphasis in journalism. 

I'd never taken a business class in my life. And the closest I ever got to being a salesperson was my first ever job at our local Martin's Supermarket where I was a cashier. Not a whole lot of sales technique needed there! 

So I jumped into this world not because I had a passion for sales but because I have an insane passion for storytelling, and I knew this was a way I could help tell stories from home while my kiddos napped. 

I honestly didn't have a clue what I was doing. I didn't know a thing about branding, marketing, analytics, or customer relations. NONE of that was in my wheelhouse. But I love learning, and I'm a good student, so I knew I could learn. I jumped into every call, webinar, training, and resource provided by our Home Office (and seriously, y'all, KEEP Collective is INSANELY GOOD with training and resources!). I watched what successful leaders in my company and the industry as a whole were doing, and I took bits and pieces that I could apply to my business. I started reading more books on professional and personal development and started reading a little less fiction. And I spent time figuring out who I was as a designer (or consultant or salesperson or representative or ambassador or whatever you're called in your company). Who was I, and what made me, me? 

And there are lots of nuggets of wisdom I could unload here. And I do - weekly - on my team's Facebook page - because when we all share those nuggets, we ALL benefit. I'm so damn lucky to do this among INCREDIBLE teammates and other designers who are always lifting each other up. 

But today, I'm sharing the biggest nugget with you. Because sharing is caring, y'all, and we're all in this together. 

The BEST piece of advice I can ever give you: Get consistent. 

I realize that probably sounds really simplistic, right? 

But consistency in your business solves SO FREAKING MANY PROBLEMS you might face. Let's break it down, okay? 

Posting on social media
Twenty years ago, the world of direct sales looked INSANELY different. Why? Because social media was just a baby (or in most cases, non-existent), and it has VASTLY changed how people share. We no longer call Aunt Agnes to tell her the latest things the kids are up to. Instead, we post our pictures and stories on Facebook and she sees it all there. We no longer have to rely on the postal service to get catalogs and information across the country. We just share a link, and poof, the information is there! 

So why does consistency matter on Social Media? Because you and your business aren't people's priority. While your best friends and family members may know what it is you do, the vast majority probably does NOT. It's important to let people know who you are and what you have to offer. 

Now, that DOESN'T mean you post 17 times a day about your business (or 17 times a day, period). But what it does mean is that you find your cadence and you commit to doing it. Maybe you share on your personal page when you have new products that launch, and you share more frequently in a group or on a business page where people make the choice to follow you. But find a rhythm that works for you and your type of business, and commit to doing it. 

Casual conversations with new people
For the first three or so years that I was designing at KEEP Collective, every single time someone asked me what I did, I'd say that I was a stay-at-home-mom. Which, true. BUT, I also work from home, and I freaking LOVE that I get the balance of both. So now when people ask what it is that I do, I tell them that I get to work from home with an incredible storytelling and jewelry business while raising my babes. It's the best of all the worlds and the perfect fit for our family. 

Sharing what you do is important, and so are those casual conversations. When you meet new people, don't be afraid to share what it is you do when it comes up! If they ask more about it, AWESOME. If they don't, that's awesome too. But keep talking about it - when applicable. 

Putting in the time 
Your business is flexible, but it's not optional. And we ALL have stuff going on. But if you're going to make your business thrive, you have to put in the time. You have to make it or find it. Getting up 20 minutes earlier. Setting aside an evening or two a week. Committing to 30 minutes on a weekend morning. Skipping an hour of Netflix here and there. It doesn't matter when or how, but the effort has to be there. And this really has to be what works best for YOU. For some people, it's really structured time the same days of the week. For others, it's fitting it in during the small crevices of the day (this is how I operate, but I know it doesn't work for everyone!). It doesn't matter how. It matters that you DO. 

There will be ebbs and flows - as in all things. And flexibility and adaptability are key. But consistency HAS to be a part of that. 

If you own your own business or are in social selling, I'd love to know, what's YOUR best piece of advice? What would you tell others? 

Stitch Fix #34: Summery shirts

Summer is here! Well, theoretically anyway - it's like 68 degrees in northern Indiana and raining all. the. time. right now. But, the calendar says summer, so celebrating summer is what we'll do! After perusing my closet the other day for a summery but not too summery top to wear, I realized I was seriously lacking in the cute top department. So naturally, it was time for a Stitch Fix! 

If you don't know about Stitch Fix (<--Referral link!), let me give you a little rundown. Stitch Fix is a clothing subscription service, and you decide how frequently, or infrequently, you'd like a shipment. You'll fill out a detailed style profile about your sizes, style preferences, and budget (and it's super fun to fill out the profile to see what your style preferences are!). Not only does Stitch Fix offer clothing, but they have accessories, bags, and even shoes! They style men, women, and children, and they offer extended sizes. And, if someone signs up through your referral link, you get a $25 credit to use toward your next purchase! (And let me tell you, that adds up to some awesome free clothes!) The BEST part of Stitch Fix? It comes directly to my door which means I can try it on in the comfort of my own home, pair it with things already in my wardrobe, and not have to take my brood into a dressing room with me. So much winning! 

This time around, I asked my fabulous stylist Serena for tops - just tops. In particular, I wanted things that I could easily run around in with the kids but still looked polished and like they had a touch of style to them. And I kind of think Serena knocked it out of the park with this box! 

1. Papermoon Lecea Key Hole Detail Knit Top, $36

I think this little number is so sweet, and I love the emerald green color mixed with florals! The tie sleeves are a cute touch, and the key hole detail on the back would be cute for days when the mom bun is in full force. Good with shorts, cute with jeans, this one might be a win! 

2. Papermoon Lesa One Pocket Knit Tank Top, $28 

This actually reminds me of a tank I used to have from H&M that I pretty much wore to death, so I was super excited to see it in the box! It's super lightweight, really soft, and has just a really simple striped pattern to it. Again, super casual for running around with the kids which is just what I need most days! 

3. Colette Leola Mixed Material Knit Top, $36

See what I mean about being a sucker for stripes? I'm also a sucker for polka dots! I love the mixed materials of this top - the patterns and actual materials! It's white, which is mildly concerning with two boys, but I also feel like this is so cute that maybe I just wouldn't wear it around the kids! 

4. Pink Clover Pallas Knot Front Knit Top, $28 

Stripes AND florals AND a cute tie at the bottom of the top?! I mean, that's just FUN! It's another easy one to throw on when I'm running with the kids, and I love that it looks polished and put together. 

5. Hazel Alvida Embroidery Detail Top, $42

This is the only one of the tops I'm not too keen on. I love the embroidery detail at the top, but it feels a little short and it's a little bit see through. I don't hate it - I just don't know that I love it either. The color is so summery though! 

And here's the kicker, friends! Because I have some credit on my account, if I keep all of them, it's going to be $69 TOTAL (Stitch Fix math is the BEST math!)! So, what do we think? What's a must keep and what needs to go back? Or do I keep it all? 

Want more to see more Fix goodness? You can see previous Fixes here:
Stitch Fix #1
Stitch Fix #2
Stitch Fix #3
Stitch Fix #4
Stitch Fix #5
Stitch Fix #6
Stitch Fix #7
Stitch Fix #8
Stitch Fix #9
Stitch Fix #10
Stitch Fix #11
Stitch Fix #12
Stitch Fix #13
Stitch Fix #14
Stitch Fix#15
Stitch Fix #16 
Stitch Fix #17
Stitch Fix #18
Stitch Fix #19
Stitch Fix #20
Stitch Fix #21
Stitch Fix #22
Stitch Fix #23
Stitch Fix #24
Stitch Fix #25
Stitch Fix #26
Stitch Fix #27
Stitch Fix #28
Stitch Fix #29
Stitch Fix #30
Stitch Fix #31
Stitch Fix #32
Stitch Fix #33

On being Intentional in 2019

If you've been following the blog for awhile (hey, thanks for doing that, by the way!), you may remember that I dubbed 2019's word of the year to be Intentional. I decided I really wanted to do a better job of focusing my energy and bucketing my time accordingly to avoid all the mindless junk. So three months into the year, it feels like a good to reflect on where things are. 

Truth be told, I took on this word because I'll be the first to admit I spend too much time on my phone. As someone who predominantly works her business from her phone, it's present a lot (read: a LOT) in my day-to-day. And I don't want my kids growing up in a house where my face is in a phone more than their business. 

Am I being more intentional? Yes. I'm spending more focused, quality time with my kids with less distractions. I'm putting the phone down more and more, and we're all going device and screen free a little more often. And I have to say, it's had a positive impact on all of us. Our four-year-old is in a WAY better mood when he watches less TV and iPad. Like way better. And my husband and I have commented more than once that we think screens are a catalyst to unsavory behavior for him. I'm using my time more wisely and making work fit into my life and not the other way around. And it's had a positive impact on our family unit as a whole - and for that, I'm grateful. 

Is it a perfect system? No. I'm still working on some of my other Intentional goals, namely my nutrition (I just loooooooove sweets!), my reactions to things that are outside of my control (oooooooh life), and the things we bring into our home (seriously, how does so much stuff just accumulate so quickly?!). 

But. But, we're moving in the right direction to being more Intentional. 

So today, I'm posing the question to you. If you could choose an area of your life to be more intentional, what would you pick? 

Stitch Fix #33: A cruise worthy ship-ment

Well, we're just cruising right through March over here at our house, and I for one couldn't be happier! Warmer weather is in the air, boots are finally packed away, and I'm super hopeful that we're going to see some serious spring coming soon. And that means the hubs and I are getting closer to our Bahamas cruise! I'm starting to think about ship attire since it's been - oh - a decade or so since I've cruised! Naturally, I needed a little Stitch Fix to help me snag a few more pieces for the boat! 

If you don't know about Stitch Fix (<--Referral link!), let me give you a little rundown. Stitch Fix is a clothing subscription service, and you decide how frequently, or infrequently, you'd like a shipment. You'll fill out a detailed style profile about your sizes, style preferences, and budget (and it's super fun to fill out the profile to see what your style preferences are!). Not only does Stitch Fix offer clothing, but they have accessories, bags, and even shoes! They style men, women, and children, and they offer extended sizes. And, if someone signs up through your referral link, you get a $25 credit to use toward your next purchase! (And let me tell you, that adds up to some awesome free clothes!) The BEST part of Stitch Fix? It comes directly to my door which means I can try it on in the comfort of my own home, pair it with things already in my wardrobe, and not have to take my brood into a dressing room with me. So much winning! 

This time around, my best gal Serena pulled some super spring-y pieces including pink jeans (can I rock pink jeans?! Undecided!), a really cute floral kimono, and some tops I really like. But I need your help trying to decide what to keep! (Also, let's pretend there was some really gorgeous natural lighting for these pics, k? K!)

1. Lakeview Denim Alex Colored Skinny Jean, $58
2. Emory Park Eilley Ruffle Sleeve Blouse, $38

Alright, y'all. Pink jeans. What do we think of these? I have a few pair of colored jeans, but they're definitely neutrals, and I feel like these are a little more bold than I'm used to. And the kimono! I need something white and coral for the cruise, so this is totally the right color pallet, but I'm not sure how I feel about the super ruffle on the sleeve. Tell me your thoughts! 

3. Alice Blue Simona Henley Blouse, $38 

LOVE the green color of this tank, and the pattern is cute! I could totally see myself wearing this shirt on the day-to-day, which is totally appealing for extended wear. Plus, it could be super cute with white shorts! 

4. Alice Blue Bushnell One Pocket Blouse, $38 

This shirt is SO sweet for spring! I love the yellow, the floral, the short sleeve, the pattern, the little pocket detail. It's super cute and lightweight, and again, I could see myself wearing it regularly mixed with other pieces I already have. 

5. French Grey Valina Back Detail Brushed Knit Dress, $48 

You may notice I look annoyed in this picture. That's because two seconds before this picture was taken, my husband/photographer opened his honest, honest mouth and said, "Huh. That dress kind of makes you look big in the middle." Hard no on this one, then! To be fair, I think it's too big overall, so it's ill fitting on TOP of the fact that it makes me look big in the middle. Thanks, hun! 

So that's my cruise-y shipment, and I need your help figuring out what to keep! 

Want more to see more Fix goodness? You can see previous Fixes here:
Stitch Fix #1
Stitch Fix #2
Stitch Fix #3
Stitch Fix #4
Stitch Fix #5
Stitch Fix #6
Stitch Fix #7
Stitch Fix #8
Stitch Fix #9
Stitch Fix #10
Stitch Fix #11
Stitch Fix #12
Stitch Fix #13
Stitch Fix #14
Stitch Fix#15
Stitch Fix #16 
Stitch Fix #17
Stitch Fix #18
Stitch Fix #19
Stitch Fix #20
Stitch Fix #21
Stitch Fix #22
Stitch Fix #23
Stitch Fix #24
Stitch Fix #25
Stitch Fix #26
Stitch Fix #27
Stitch Fix #28
Stitch Fix #29
Stitch Fix #30
Stitch Fix #31
Stitch Fix #32

What the Marines taught me about motherhood

About a decade ago, my sweet coworker Jerra and I traveled to San Diego for a week to learn about the Marine Corps. It was a trip for Indiana educators sponsored by the Marines so that we could get a literal inside look into the military in case we had students who might be interested in pursuing the career path. 

The trip was so eye opening in so many ways. I was incredibly ignorant when it came to the military, and the trip was equal parts learning, growing, and fun (and drinking, if we're being totally honest here). That trip still occasionally pops into my mind, especially since I became a mother. 

Because almost daily, there's a mantra I learned from my time with the Marines that I fall back on. 

One of the coolest parts of the trip was on the second day of our boot camp experience when we got to have lunch with some of the guys going through basic training. These guys had been on base for 6-7-8 weeks without any civilian contact by the time we got there, so we were a welcome sight in the mess hall that day. Jerra and I sat down with a REALLY nice young man who reminded me of so many of my students. Super smart, super talented, and wanted to do something amazing with his life. We talked for a long time about his family, his high school experience, the teachers he had, and what he wanted his future to look like. And we had the opportunity to ask him a lot of questions. And so I asked him - How do you do this every day? Knowing that the whole goal is essentially to break you down to build you back up stronger? How do you persevere through that? 

Me and Jerra having lunch with our Marine recruit!

He thought about it for a little while, but he finally just said, "Ma'am (btw, I was all of 26 at the time of this trip, but I got ma'amed everywhere we went) - Ma'am, I just focus on getting from chow to chow. I try not to think about the weeks or days that are left before I get to move onto the next step. I just focus on making it to breakfast, and then to lunch, and then to dinner, and then to breakfast again. Small goals. It helps me to stay positive." 

That conversation stuck with me, I suppose, because when I became a mom, and in particular, a work-from-home mom, his words came back to me. 

I LOVE almost everything about being a mom. I love the way my sweet boys are all snuggly and red-cheeked when they wake up in the morning. I love watching them learn something new or accomplish milestones they've been working on during the day. I love their love for each other. And I love that I get to spend so much time with them. I'm incredibly blessed to be able to stay at home with them, and I don't take that for granted. 

But y'all, I live in reality, and this job is HARD. It's the hardest job in the world with incredible stakes and no real performance review to help you improve every six months or so. Some days, it feels like the movie Groundhog's Day - wash, rinse, repeat. Chasing two little boys really IS super rewarding, but it's also mentally (and sometimes physically and emotionally) exhausting. 

So on those totally hard days, I embrace this mentality. I don't look at the month ahead or the week ahead or even the whole day ahead. I just focus on the next few hours until we get to a meal. Because ANYTHING is possible for a few hours. 

On the super hard days, I've trained myself to see the meal as a reset. Going forward, positive vibes. Whatever happened prior to that meal is water under the bridge, and we reset the day. 

Again, I love in reality, so this doesn't always work flawlessly. Some days are just a MESS regardless of a different meal, a mental reset, whatever. But some days, we DO reset, and we have an amazing afternoon or evening together when mere hours before, the day looked like a catastrophe. 

I did a lot of learning on that trip to San Diego a decade ago. But this lesson - this is the one I carry with me now as a mom. And I encourage you to try it too!