Let's dive right in, shall we? When the ball dropped on NYE 2019, my husband and I had some serious talks about whether or not we were going to add one more family member. We'd always been on the fence between two and three children, and we knew that if we were going to have another, it was now or never. We both turned 37 in 2020, and our oldest will be six next year, and we wanted everyone close together. So, we decided we'd wait until after our Disney trip in February, and then we'd see what happened.
Well, as you know, the world exploded. We returned home from Disney on March 4, about five seconds before everything in the world shut down due to Covid. Life got strange in so many ways. But our plan stayed the same - we knew we still wanted to add another baby, and if we could, we wanted that to be soon. And, as luck would have it, in early June, I got a positive pregnancy test!
But, navigating a pregnancy during a pandemic is WEIRD, for so many reasons. We knew several friends that were due at the beginning of the pandemic, but of course, they'd had no idea there would be a worldwide illness outbreak when they got pregnant. We, on the other hand, kind of knew what we were up against (although we hoped and prayed it would be long gone by the time the baby came).
Gratefully, this babe is our third, so we knew what pregnancy was like during "normal" times. I was blessed with in person baby showers with our oldest, and we had a wonderful sprinkle with our second baby. I continued going to my favorite workout classes and taught Jazzercise until I was 35 weeks pregnant with both babes. People hugged me. They touched my belly. I went to lunch with my girlfriends and playdates with my oldest, and life continued as normal.
This pregnancy has been - weird. I haven't seen more of my friends in person in months. Most have never seen me pregnant this time around. It feels weird to not physically share such a monumental journey of having a baby with the people I'm close to.
I haven't gone out to stroll the aisles of baby clothes, diapers, and gadgets for our little man. Gratefully, we have mostly everything we need already, but it feels weird to not take some of those quiet moments to just go look for new little things for him.
Hell, the fact that we even found out the baby is a HIM is because of this pandemic! We didn't find out with our previous two babies, but of course, we had the luxury of having our families come to the hospital to meet our boys. This time around, his own brothers won't be there to meet him in his first few days, so we opted to find out so they'd know in advance what they were getting.
But. BUT.
There are so many great things that have come out of this pandemic pregnancy too. Honestly.
Our family has spent more time together, and I feel like we've better prepared both brothers for what's to come. I know part of that is just KNOWING what it's like to have multiple kids, but I feel like we've gotten so much quality time together in these past several months, and I don't know if life would have naturally slowed down for us to do that otherwise.
I've been able to tune in more to what my body is saying it needs. I tend to be VERY go-go-go, and that's great. But sometimes I ignore the triggers that say, "you need to slow down," or, "you're tired - you need to rest." While this pregnancy has been stressful just because of the state of the world, it's been so much easier to step back and listen (and take more naps!).
I've savored this pregnancy more... I mean, maybe not that first trimester, but AFTER that part. Because of slowing down, I've noticed the flutters and the kicks and those things that much more - I felt this baby LONG before I felt the other two.
Maybe it's the pandemic. Maybe it's knowing it's my last pregnancy. But it's made me more grateful for those moments.
So, if you're in the midst of a pandemic pregnancy too, give yourself grace in all the things. Have gratitude when you can. Feel when you need to. And give yourself grace, always.
And when you can, enjoy the ride. <3
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