"You'll lose so much weight breastfeeding!" and other lies they tell you about parenthood

Before having our son ten weeks ago, I was told a lot of different things! 

"You'll get so many naps because you get to sleep when the baby sleeps!"

"Your child will just adjust to living in your world!"

"You can eat whatever you want because you're breastfeeding and the weight just melts right off you!"

I hate to be a cynic, but I call BS on all three of these (and probably many more). For example, I'm so tired, I just tried to spell cynic cinic. And then I tried synic. Before finally coming up with cynic and thus ending this paragraph. 

I have said it before, and I'll say it again, I LOVE being a mom. But being a parent is the most demanding thing I have ever done, physically and emotionally. And I'm lucky enough to have a SUPER supportive and involved daddy at my side! 

Lie #1: You get to sleep when the baby sleeps. Sure, I suppose this is true as long as you never need to do anything else. Like laundry. Or eat a meal. Or go to the bathroom by yourself. With the exception of nighttime, I think I can count on one hand how many times I've napped when the baby's been napping. It's not because I don't like naps, because I seriously LOVE a good nap. But I do find it's the only uninterrupted time I have to get much of anything accomplished, so alas, I don't sleep when the baby sleeps. This one is my own fault, and I know it. 

Lie #2: The baby will adjust to living in our world. Prior to Henry's birth, I really thought he would have to fit in to our lives. We were here first, darnit! That went out the window, umm, like immediately. It's Henry's world, and we're just living in it. I arrange outings and get togethers around his schedule. I turn down plans if he's overtired or having a particularly grumpy time. I feel like eventually this might change, and we might take back some of the control, but for now, I'm perfectly content with adjusting to him. 

Lie #3: The baby weight will fall right off if you breastfeed. This is the biggest lie of them all. Having now exclusively breastfed for 10 weeks, I can assure you that these last ten pounds are going nowhere fast. I've stagnated the last four or so weeks, and the scale has all but stopped moving downward. It's frustrating. I think there's a giant misconception that you're expending extra calories, so you're bound to lose weight, but I don't think it's true for everyone. So for now, I'm embracing the extra weight, because what else can you do?! 

Those are the three biggest parenting lies I've encountered thus far. What's the biggest lie about parenting that you were told?