From April 2011-April 2012, I ran 494 miles. That sounds like a LOT of miles. And it is a lot of miles. But, really, that's less than ten miles a week. Totally do-able! 


I've been thinking a lot about what my mileage is going to look like after Indy this Saturday (THIS SATURDAY, PEOPLE!). I know I want to back off of distance for awhile, but I don't want to stop running, so I plan to focus on speed. I was saying to Dan this weekend that even if I only ran two miles a day, that would still be 14 miles a week for this year. That sounds totally and completely do-able. 


So, the 2012-2013 goal is 550 miles... 550 glorious, fast, wonderful miles. And it'll kick off this weekend with 13.1. :) Indy, here we come! 

Una mas

One more week. Just one more week until I'm in a car, heading to Indy with Dan, to do this whole half marathon thing all over again. Am I crazy? Maybe. Am I sort of ready to get through this test? Absolutely. 


I got my race card in the mail for Indy upon my return from Vegas. It has my corral on it from the seed time I sent in from the Disney Princess Half. 


In the Disney Princess Half Marathon, I was in corral H, and started, oh, about 40 minutes after the race actually did. 


For Indy, I'm in corral F, which seemed pretty normal until I looked at the map and realized the corrals START WITH E. Which means I have gone from being the absolute LAST corral to the SECOND corral. I would be lying if I said I wasn't feeling some pressure to live up to the speed of those around me. My stomach goes to knots just thinking about it. See, the beauty of starting last is, you get to pass people right and left and feel like a rockstar when you're done. The fear I have now is that I will be the one being passed or in the way of other runners. I definitely do NOT want to be in the way. 


Alas, with a week to go, I'm starting to feel the nerves, the pressure, and the excitement. I'm looking forward to a weekend with friends, an awesome expo, and all that Indy has to offer. 


Bring it!

Where have I been?

I will tell you. :) 


Last Wednesday was my 29th birthday. I was so fortunate this year to celebrate with so many wonderful, loving people! It was a great, great day. Additionally, it was really awesome to be able to reflect on my 28th year and all I accomplished. It was a good year... but 29 is gearing up to be great! 


THEN, on Thursday, I left for fabulous Las Vegas with one of my favorite Brides to Be, Shannon. We got in late Thursday night and spent the weekend walking the strip, eating fabulous foods (Oh, Bellagio buffet! Oh, Border Grill!), drinking delicious drinks, and not getting nearly enough sleep. We even got in a Cirque de Soleil show. AH-MA-ZING. 


Miraculously, I went for a run after school and before the plane ride on Thursday. And, I woke up early and ran six miles on the treadmill in Mandalay Bay on Saturday. And I ran today before Jazzercise. Maybe the fact that Indy is looming ever closer is making me slightly more motivated. 


So, it's chugging along this week. I'm trying to just keep swimming. Extra meetings, extra work, conferences, being out of town three weekends in a row. Swimming, swimming, swimming. 


But I have a really supportive swim partner these days. And I couldn't ask for much more than that. :) 

Runner's guilt

I tend to be a guilty person. (Not like crimes, people!) I feel guilty when others are suffering. I feel guilty when something doesn't go the way it's supposed to (even if it's not my fault or my doing). I feel guilty when I know I could have given more. 


I have a lot of runner's guilt. Runner's guilt is a strange beast. I feel terribly guilty when I don't run on nights I'm "supposed" to run. The training manual tells me to run a certain amount of mileage four times a week. I've only been running three times a week (but got over that guilt during half marathon one). Lately, though, I've been running... maybe twice a week... and maybe not the amount of mileage I'm supposed to. 


Why, why, why do I feel guilty? Who am I letting down? No one... except myself. Who's going to suffer from me not running? No one... except me. And yet sometimes I feel like I'm disappointing others when I don't get my runs in. 


It's ludicrous, I know. Believe me, I know! 


I'm looking forward to releasing the runner's guilt. Bring on Indy! 

10.

I keep thinking back to this time last year when I was in Washington D.C. to see Meredith with Teresa. Teresa was training for her first half marathon (Indy) and had to do a seven mile run. Like an idiot, I agreed to go with her. I ran six of those seven miles, and I remember thinking how proud I was of running two more miles than I'd ever run before. I never, ever, thought I could double that. But I have. 


This morning, I ran ten miles. Ten miles. In my subdivision. In ten loops. Because I was afraid the rain would start and I would be stranded far from home. That's a lot of repetition, people. 


It didn't feel great, but I did it. I didn't do it fast, but I did it. I ran ten miles. Ten. Miles! 


I thought about a lot of things while I was running, but two people kept popping back up. 


1. My college friend Lauren wrote a note yesterday about running her first 5K. She's been training and working her way up to it and now it's looming ever closer. It made me remember all the reasons I started running... and all of the physical and mental blocks I had (or have) about running. I know she can do it. I know she will beat all those blocks and continue on this incredible journey. And yet sometimes I question myself with running. Why is it that we always question ourselves?


2. My coworker Monica has been wheel chair bound for about a month now. This week, I helped get her from a meeting to school and was reminded that wheelchairs are tough to lift, move, and navigate. Monica is handling it beautifully and is still teaching despite her pain. Maybe I needed a gentle reminder that my legs are working right now, therefore, I should use them. 


Ten more miles down. Lots more to go. :) 

Today I am thankful for...

Today I am thankful for...

...supportive friends and family members

...extra hours of daylight

...cute Under Armour running gear

...pretzels and peanut butter

...achey joints, so I remember not to take my health for granted

...Sherry's Disney run opening up for registration (!!!)

...a night completely free from grading

...a small kick of recommitment for the Indy Half Marathon

and most importantly

...not letting any of my very valid excuses get in the way of today's run :)

Honest to blog

So, this is going to be an honest blog. As you know, if you've read, oh, any of my last ten or so blogs, the running bug has been absent from my life lately. I've found little to no joy and little to no fun in running since the Princess half. In fact, on Saturday, I was supposed to run 12 miles. I'd talked myself down to 10. Then I procrastinated leaving for so long that I only had time to do 7.5. I also skipped my mid-week run last week. Ugh. 

I had to ask myself, "Self, what was it you LOVED about running when you started?" And here's the truth: I loved that it was a release for the stress that had been building. I loved that it was something that gave me focus. But mostly, I LOVED that it made me feel strong when I sort of felt like strength was fleeting. 

In a weird way, I don't want to beat myself up about not running right now, because in a weird way, I think that my lack of running just means that I don't need it to feel strong. (Maybe someone should call the weird police!) I just... feel strong again. Running propelled me there. I'm happy with where I'm at. And I'm not feeling the need to compete with myself daily to continue to prove that I can do it. I think maybe I just know I can do it. 

That being said, we'll see how I feel at mile 9 or mile 12 of the Indy Half Marathon (which, thanks to E's countdown, I know is only 25 short days away!). I want to do well, of course, but I'm not willing to sacrifice a ton of my time and a marginal amount of my happiness to do it right now. The goal is to get a good run in tomorrow, a loooooooooong run in on Saturday, and then taper down until the race. I have busy weekends ahead (a celebration this weekend, Vegas for Shannon's bachelorette party, shopping for bridesmaids dresses with T), and I'm not willing to push off those things for runs. 

(The love comes back eventually, right?)

A little inspiration

"Running is as much about settling into a lifelong groove as it is about constantly changing course." -Evelyn Spence

A toe pictorial

Pictures are worth a thousand words. But the only one I can come up with here is ick.

Playing nice with others

I have a confession to make: Sometimes, I do not play well with others. I've written about this before, but I feel like it deserves revisiting. 


I have a hard time running with others. I think this is for many, many reasons:
1. I worry about holding him/her back.
2. I worry about him/her holding me back. 
3. I become too focused on the other person and what s/he is doing as opposed to what I'm supposed to be doing. 
4. I already do a group exercise (Jazzercise!) and I think I need a solitary activity. 
5. If I'm being really honest... I'm competitive. And sensitive. 


There are only a few people I can really run well with -- and it's because we have similar paces and styles and because I don't feel the need to be competitive with them (only me, duh). 


Case in point, a few weeks ago, Dan and I went for a run. Me? I've been running for three years and just recently finished a half marathon. Dan? He doesn't run. And eats cookies and pie for breakfast. Naturally, I overestimated how much I would impress him. 


So, Dan and I set off for our run. I left the iPod at home, and we took off at a conversational pace. I should also mention this was the day that the wind was gusting, like 28 mph gusting. Dan and I do our run, together, and at the end, he SPRINTS OFF LEAVING ME IN HIS DUST. 


I couldn't have caught him if I tried. And I know this, because I tried. 


On Saturday, I ran 7.5 miles by myself. And on Sunday, I was supposed to run three. Dan and I were going to try running together again. And he suggested we run five. I was dreading it. I dragged my feet for about thirty minutes. 


Dan: Do you not want to run together? 
Angela: No. I want to run together. ::shuffles around the kitchen picking up imaginary dirt::


Finally, I could avoid it no more. We set out. About half a mile in, I got hit in the face with a raindrop. 


Angela: It's raining! Maybe we should go back!
Dan: It looks like it will clear up. 
Angela: Oh. ::shuffles iPod to catchier song since it's obvious we're actually doing this::


I will spare you the details of the five mile run. I will tell you only that we both survived and I still felt good at the end of it. It didn't rain on us. There weren't 25 mph wind gusts. And we were both smiling at the end. But maybe one of us was smiling bigger. (I maintain that he stayed behind me on purpose.) 


So, maybe I was dreading it. But, in the end, it worked out pretty well. And maybe, just maybe, running all those miles this weekend helped me feel good again about running. 


I suppose I'm learning how to play nice with others.